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Losing A Parent Around The Holidays
Both Brain and Heart Won’t Forget, But They Will Heal
Why do all the memories — the painful ones of loss loved ones — creep up during the holidays?
Why are the memories that hurt us the most the most vivid of them all?
It’ll be thirteen years this December 26th since my mother passed away, but this memory frequents me like a common cold. It’s both seasonal and unexpected. It can become crippling or just give me pause. It happens when I see a mother and daughter shopping in public. It happens when I eat apple crisp, warm from the oven. It happens when I have a problem and it’s her advice I want.
With each ache for her, I face a growing realization that I’m forgetting her.
I can’t remember the sound of her voice.
I can’t remember what she smelled like.
Yet no matter the time that passes, I have this memory vivid with detail. It’s the day leading up to my mother’s passing and the day of. With this memory comes a question you may be familiar with: why this memory out of all other memories?